I am someone who cares deeply about those I let into my life. I can care so much that if someone comes to me with their problems I take it on personally and try to fix it for them. I get my emotions so deeply involved with those I care about that I can literally feel their pain, sadness, happiness as my own.
That said God has been working with me on disconnecting a little. Disconnecting where I can still be there for someone but not take on their problems as my own. I am learning to let go and give it all to God. Because I can't fix their problems but he can.
One of the hardest thing for me is to sit back and watch those I love sit in their hurt, pain and confusion. I can reach out, listen and give advice where I can. But ultimately they are responsible for their own lives. Nothing is going to change until they are ready to take the steps to heal and move on from where they are stuck.
I know that because I had to do it myself. I sat with a bitter, unhappy, ungrateful heart for years without knowing. I sat in my own mess without taking action to truly heal and move on from past hurts. I got to the point where I was miserable and I hit rock bottom to were I really didn't see that point of life anymore. That was my wake up call. The fact that I was numb to life, my family and my kids scared me. They were the things/people that meant most to me and I felt so disconnected.
My passions for the things I loved were gone. I had panic attacks daily, I was numb and cried a lot. My husband was at a complete loss at how to help me. I was taking care of my children's physical needs by just going through the motions. It didn't take me more then a few days of going through all that to realize that I needed to fight to get my life back.
Right away I jumped into God's word and had inspirational teachings on tv almost 24/7. I was going to fill my mind and spirit with good things. I got my children outside and took good walks everyday. I started taking care of myself better. My husband and I found an amazing new church close to home and started going.
All this said nothing changed over night. But with hard work and trust in my heavenly father I walked out my mess in about four to five months. I could have chose to have sat in it and said "well I guess that this is just my new normal". But I didn't I chose to fight and that's where people need to get to before things can really change.
People need to get the the point where they are truly ready to make a change and fight for the life that they want. We can't help them until THEY are ready and it is so hard because we love them. We want to fix everything for them but we can't. But they can when they are ready to fight for their life back.
In the mean time all we can do is encourage and be there to listen to them. One other huge thing we can do is pray because God knows them better then we do and when we pray it makes a difference.
Zack and I
7 Years And Going Strong!
Thursday, November 29, 2018
Thursday, June 7, 2018
Birthday Madness
I just recently had a birthday and let's just say it was quite a day. My day started out with my son wetting the bed. Then he proceeded to trail the pee all the way down our hall and into my husband and I's room.
Let' just say cleaning up urine is not how I wanted to start my morning. My husband got up and help even though he wasn't feeling well. My sweet hubby was running on very little sleep and was not in the best mood. But as a team we got it done.
Later that day I had plans to meet some friends for lunch. Lunch went wonderful. It was great catching up with the girls and all of our kids did great the whole time. At the end of our time together we took the time to take cute pictures of the kids. I had such a great time. Until I was getting my kids in the car my phone dropped on the cement. Which was not the first time so I didn't think much of it. Well when I got into the car and tried to use it I couldn't get the screen to work. It went totally black.
My phone was ruined. I had to drive to my sister in laws praying she would be home so I could use her phone. Thankfully she was and I was able to get a hold of my husband. He told me just to run to the store and buy a new one. So I had to run to Wal-Mart with my two sleepy kids and spend money on a new phone. The person who helped me was wonderful and did a great job. But by the time we got back into the car my kid were exhausted. They slept probably 15 of the 25 minute drive home.
Once home I tried to put them down for a nap and they didn't go back to sleep. Well because they didn't nap long enough by 6:30pm they were screaming, fighting and overly tired. My day felt like it had been so long by the time I got them to bed by 7:30pm. After the kids were in bed and my house was quiet I looked back on my crazy day.
You know what I realized? I realize that I am blessed and my day was a blessing. I am blessed I got to have a 28th birthday. Not everybody gets as lucky. I am blessed to have my kids and my husband. Not everybody gets as lucky. Yes my birthday was FAR from perfect. But I get to have a 28th year of life. Not everybody gets a lucky.
I will take every imperfect day with my beautiful family. I am lucky, I am blessed and I am loved. In the mist of the chaos I was spoiled. I was spoiled with gifts, texts and facebook messages.
Jeremiah 29:11 say "For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord " plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future"
So I just want to encourage you if you had a rough day. Sit down and look back on it. Try to find the good in the day and be thankful for it. Be thankful for each day you wake up. God has good things in store for each day. Sometimes we just have to search for it a little harder.
Let' just say cleaning up urine is not how I wanted to start my morning. My husband got up and help even though he wasn't feeling well. My sweet hubby was running on very little sleep and was not in the best mood. But as a team we got it done.
Later that day I had plans to meet some friends for lunch. Lunch went wonderful. It was great catching up with the girls and all of our kids did great the whole time. At the end of our time together we took the time to take cute pictures of the kids. I had such a great time. Until I was getting my kids in the car my phone dropped on the cement. Which was not the first time so I didn't think much of it. Well when I got into the car and tried to use it I couldn't get the screen to work. It went totally black.
My phone was ruined. I had to drive to my sister in laws praying she would be home so I could use her phone. Thankfully she was and I was able to get a hold of my husband. He told me just to run to the store and buy a new one. So I had to run to Wal-Mart with my two sleepy kids and spend money on a new phone. The person who helped me was wonderful and did a great job. But by the time we got back into the car my kid were exhausted. They slept probably 15 of the 25 minute drive home.
Once home I tried to put them down for a nap and they didn't go back to sleep. Well because they didn't nap long enough by 6:30pm they were screaming, fighting and overly tired. My day felt like it had been so long by the time I got them to bed by 7:30pm. After the kids were in bed and my house was quiet I looked back on my crazy day.
You know what I realized? I realize that I am blessed and my day was a blessing. I am blessed I got to have a 28th birthday. Not everybody gets as lucky. I am blessed to have my kids and my husband. Not everybody gets as lucky. Yes my birthday was FAR from perfect. But I get to have a 28th year of life. Not everybody gets a lucky.
I will take every imperfect day with my beautiful family. I am lucky, I am blessed and I am loved. In the mist of the chaos I was spoiled. I was spoiled with gifts, texts and facebook messages.
Jeremiah 29:11 say "For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord " plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future"
So I just want to encourage you if you had a rough day. Sit down and look back on it. Try to find the good in the day and be thankful for it. Be thankful for each day you wake up. God has good things in store for each day. Sometimes we just have to search for it a little harder.
Friday, April 20, 2018
Life update for the first 1/2 of 2018
2018 has been a great year so far. Lots of fun things planned for this year.
Lets start with the youngest of our family Autumn. Autumn is going to be two next month. She is growing and learning so much. Her vocabulary is increasing at a rapid rate. She is in her "terrific" twos and experiencing all the emotions that come with it. She has an obsession with the TV show Daniel Tiger. I love having a little girl, she is such a mommy's girl. I love getting to rock her and read to her every night. I know she wont stay this little for long so I am soaking it up.
Bryson my sweet FOUR year old. Yes folks you just read that correctly Bryson is now four as of last Saturday. He's having a growth spurt and eating ALL the time. I know what you're thinking "Just wait until his teenage years...lol". Zack and I got him a tee ball set for his birthday and he loves it so much. He's actually really good at it already. He keeps saying "I am going to be on a really good baseball team". I hope maybe next year we can find him a team to play on.
Zack he's doing great. He's been busy working a lot. I am so proud of him for all the hard work he puts into running his own business. I see how stressful it is and I know it's not easy. I just am so thankful he works so hard and because it allows me to stay at home with our kids.
As for me I am doing well. I am studying to become a certified aromatherapist. It's been hard to find time to study since I have a lot on my plate as a mom and wife. The good thing about course I am taking is it's self paced. So I don't have to get it done in any strict time frame. My goal is to be certified by the beginning of 2019. That gives me plenty of time to get my classes, paper, and case studies done.
Zack and I have also joined a small group which has been a lot of fun. That's something we haven't done since we had our babies. This year we are excited to go new places and do mini travel trips around our area. There is so much to see and do. Now that the weather is getting nicer we are excited to started venturing out.
So there is a quick update on our life. It's been a wonderful years so far! I am looking forward to what the rest of the year brings.
Thanks for taking the time to read about our lives!
Lets start with the youngest of our family Autumn. Autumn is going to be two next month. She is growing and learning so much. Her vocabulary is increasing at a rapid rate. She is in her "terrific" twos and experiencing all the emotions that come with it. She has an obsession with the TV show Daniel Tiger. I love having a little girl, she is such a mommy's girl. I love getting to rock her and read to her every night. I know she wont stay this little for long so I am soaking it up.
Bryson my sweet FOUR year old. Yes folks you just read that correctly Bryson is now four as of last Saturday. He's having a growth spurt and eating ALL the time. I know what you're thinking "Just wait until his teenage years...lol". Zack and I got him a tee ball set for his birthday and he loves it so much. He's actually really good at it already. He keeps saying "I am going to be on a really good baseball team". I hope maybe next year we can find him a team to play on.
Zack he's doing great. He's been busy working a lot. I am so proud of him for all the hard work he puts into running his own business. I see how stressful it is and I know it's not easy. I just am so thankful he works so hard and because it allows me to stay at home with our kids.
As for me I am doing well. I am studying to become a certified aromatherapist. It's been hard to find time to study since I have a lot on my plate as a mom and wife. The good thing about course I am taking is it's self paced. So I don't have to get it done in any strict time frame. My goal is to be certified by the beginning of 2019. That gives me plenty of time to get my classes, paper, and case studies done.
Zack and I have also joined a small group which has been a lot of fun. That's something we haven't done since we had our babies. This year we are excited to go new places and do mini travel trips around our area. There is so much to see and do. Now that the weather is getting nicer we are excited to started venturing out.
So there is a quick update on our life. It's been a wonderful years so far! I am looking forward to what the rest of the year brings.
Thanks for taking the time to read about our lives!
Monday, April 9, 2018
Live A Fulfilled Life
When I look at my life I see so many things to be grateful for. I have a honest loving husband who provides for me, helps me around the house and helps me with our two little kids. I have two beautiful healthy children who challenge me to be the best version of myself each day.
Life is not always easy but I have found that changing how I look at things makes things much easier. It's so easy to forget to be grateful for all the beautiful things in life. We can get wrapped up in what everyone else has or what we don't have and forget all the wonderful things we have.
God has a specific plan for our lives and it doesn't look like anyone else's. His plan for each of us is unique just as we are. There is so much beauty in each day. Every morning we wake up is a gift. We get to live another day and make the day what we want.
Not everyday is going to be easy or go our way. But being thankful for the things we have can make a big difference in our day. Being thankful for just waking up and getting to live another day is a beautiful thing. When we have a more positive out look on things our days seem to go better.
We can't keep letting the enemy steal our happiness. He's going to try for sure because he hates us and he hates that we love God. But the good thing is that joy comes for the lord. Nehemiah 8:10"...And be not grieved and depressed, for the joy of the Lord is your strength and stronghold." So if that was true then why wouldn't it be true now?
Anytime we're doing what God wants for our lives and choosing to live a life dependent on Him the enemy will come at us with resistance. We will come up against some hard stuff. But we can choose joy because it's a time where we can put our faith into practice.
We can't give up just because things get hard or we aren't seeing what we want come to pass right away. Be faithful and trust God. We can't let our faith get shaken. The enemy is so good at distracting us and getting us discouraged.
But we need to stay the course, pray and seek out what God has for us. Then hold on to that dream/plan and don't let it go. Things will get more peaceful when we are in His perfect will for our lives. It's not going to be perfect because we live in a fallen world. But it will be more peaceful and we will be living a more fulfilled lives.
Life is not always easy but I have found that changing how I look at things makes things much easier. It's so easy to forget to be grateful for all the beautiful things in life. We can get wrapped up in what everyone else has or what we don't have and forget all the wonderful things we have.
God has a specific plan for our lives and it doesn't look like anyone else's. His plan for each of us is unique just as we are. There is so much beauty in each day. Every morning we wake up is a gift. We get to live another day and make the day what we want.
Not everyday is going to be easy or go our way. But being thankful for the things we have can make a big difference in our day. Being thankful for just waking up and getting to live another day is a beautiful thing. When we have a more positive out look on things our days seem to go better.
We can't keep letting the enemy steal our happiness. He's going to try for sure because he hates us and he hates that we love God. But the good thing is that joy comes for the lord. Nehemiah 8:10"...And be not grieved and depressed, for the joy of the Lord is your strength and stronghold." So if that was true then why wouldn't it be true now?
Anytime we're doing what God wants for our lives and choosing to live a life dependent on Him the enemy will come at us with resistance. We will come up against some hard stuff. But we can choose joy because it's a time where we can put our faith into practice.
We can't give up just because things get hard or we aren't seeing what we want come to pass right away. Be faithful and trust God. We can't let our faith get shaken. The enemy is so good at distracting us and getting us discouraged.
But we need to stay the course, pray and seek out what God has for us. Then hold on to that dream/plan and don't let it go. Things will get more peaceful when we are in His perfect will for our lives. It's not going to be perfect because we live in a fallen world. But it will be more peaceful and we will be living a more fulfilled lives.
Monday, April 2, 2018
Stop Believing The Lies
James 1:2-3 says: "My Brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience."
When you fall into temptations, anxiety or depression you often say "God is testing my faith". Or God has put this in my life to teach me something. But that is not true. Satan is the tempter and the evil one. Yes God "allows" it but it's not His will for our lives.
Later on in James 1:13-14 it says "Let no man say when he is tempted, I am tempted of God: for God cannot be tempted with evil, neither tempteth he any man; But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of this own lust and enticed."
Satan will draw you away and tempt you. He will test your faith. If you are praying and believing for a certain thing satan will come and put doubt in your mind. He may even bring trails were the situation you're believing for seems to be getting worse and not better.
That is where your faith comes in. You need to trust God with all your heart and not let satan sneak in with his lies. God's word is truth. You don't have to live an anxious life because Philippians 4:6 says "Be anxious for nothing". You don't have to live depressed because Romans 15:13 says "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing [through the experience of faith] that by the power of the Holy Spirit you will abound in hope and overflow with confidence in His promises.
John 10:10 says "The thief comes not but for to steal, and to kill and to destroy; I have come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly". God wants us to have an abundant life. When are you going to stop believing satan's lies and start believing the word of God?
God says in Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans and thoughts that I have for you, plans for peace and well-being and not for disaster to give you a future and a hope." God has such good plans for your life. The plans he has for you are different then the plans he has for anyone else. You're life is one of a kind, you are one of a kind.
Don't let the evil one steal your life, joy or happiness. No matter the circumstance, no matter how bad things may look. STAND on the word of God. If satan tries to tell you your going to die early or your suicidal you say, NO Psalms 91:16 says "With long life I will satisfy him and I will let him see My salvation. 1 Corinthians says "...But we have the mind of Christ [to be guided by His thoughts and purposes]." You don't have to believe satans lies.
Satan is the kings of lies, but God is the King of life. In God there is HOPE, JOY, true unconditional LOVE, PEACE and LIFE. Don't let satan steal on more minute, hour, or day of your life. Start living the awesome life God has for you.
I hope this can help someone today!
God Bless you all.
When you fall into temptations, anxiety or depression you often say "God is testing my faith". Or God has put this in my life to teach me something. But that is not true. Satan is the tempter and the evil one. Yes God "allows" it but it's not His will for our lives.
Later on in James 1:13-14 it says "Let no man say when he is tempted, I am tempted of God: for God cannot be tempted with evil, neither tempteth he any man; But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of this own lust and enticed."
Satan will draw you away and tempt you. He will test your faith. If you are praying and believing for a certain thing satan will come and put doubt in your mind. He may even bring trails were the situation you're believing for seems to be getting worse and not better.
That is where your faith comes in. You need to trust God with all your heart and not let satan sneak in with his lies. God's word is truth. You don't have to live an anxious life because Philippians 4:6 says "Be anxious for nothing". You don't have to live depressed because Romans 15:13 says "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing [through the experience of faith] that by the power of the Holy Spirit you will abound in hope and overflow with confidence in His promises.
John 10:10 says "The thief comes not but for to steal, and to kill and to destroy; I have come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly". God wants us to have an abundant life. When are you going to stop believing satan's lies and start believing the word of God?
God says in Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans and thoughts that I have for you, plans for peace and well-being and not for disaster to give you a future and a hope." God has such good plans for your life. The plans he has for you are different then the plans he has for anyone else. You're life is one of a kind, you are one of a kind.
Don't let the evil one steal your life, joy or happiness. No matter the circumstance, no matter how bad things may look. STAND on the word of God. If satan tries to tell you your going to die early or your suicidal you say, NO Psalms 91:16 says "With long life I will satisfy him and I will let him see My salvation. 1 Corinthians says "...But we have the mind of Christ [to be guided by His thoughts and purposes]." You don't have to believe satans lies.
Satan is the kings of lies, but God is the King of life. In God there is HOPE, JOY, true unconditional LOVE, PEACE and LIFE. Don't let satan steal on more minute, hour, or day of your life. Start living the awesome life God has for you.
I hope this can help someone today!
God Bless you all.
Saturday, March 10, 2018
Set your mind on GOOD things
Our minds have so much to do with how our day and even life goes. I've had to do and a lot of retraining my thoughts. I still have to when I see myself falling back in my old ways of thinking.
I used to just dwell on any thought that popped into my head and let it affect my day how ever it may. Lets just say that being in the wrong mind set lead me to the scariest point I've ever been in my life. But once I reach that point I knew things needed to change. I started to slowly changing my mind set by spending time in God's word.
Philippians 4:8 says "Finally, Believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God's word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think CONTINUALLY on theses things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart]."
I love this verse because it shows us we can choose to think on good, pure and wholesome things. We don't have to stress and worry about the things in our day. Our minds are what determines how our lives and days go .If we don't have a healthy thought life we are going to be miserable. Trust me I've been there and it's not fun
1 Corinthians 2:16 says "...But we have the minds of Christ [to be guided by His thoughts and purposes]"
If you are a Christian and have accepted Jesus into your life then you have the all knowing Holy Spirit living inside you. Which me means through the Holy Spirit we have the minds of Christ! So we should cast down every anxious and stressful thought. We should fill our minds with God's word and with all things that are lovely and pure. Fill our minds with things that make us happy not scared or stressed.
I know there is a lot more peace in my house when I set my mind on peaceful things. Our minds are such amazing things and to know we can have control of our own thoughts has changed my life.
So I encourage to be mindful of what you think on during the day. If it doesn't bring peace or joy to your life cas those thoughts down. Then start thinking on good, healthy things. Your life will slowly change and have more joy in it.
I used to just dwell on any thought that popped into my head and let it affect my day how ever it may. Lets just say that being in the wrong mind set lead me to the scariest point I've ever been in my life. But once I reach that point I knew things needed to change. I started to slowly changing my mind set by spending time in God's word.
Philippians 4:8 says "Finally, Believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God's word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think CONTINUALLY on theses things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart]."
I love this verse because it shows us we can choose to think on good, pure and wholesome things. We don't have to stress and worry about the things in our day. Our minds are what determines how our lives and days go .If we don't have a healthy thought life we are going to be miserable. Trust me I've been there and it's not fun
1 Corinthians 2:16 says "...But we have the minds of Christ [to be guided by His thoughts and purposes]"
If you are a Christian and have accepted Jesus into your life then you have the all knowing Holy Spirit living inside you. Which me means through the Holy Spirit we have the minds of Christ! So we should cast down every anxious and stressful thought. We should fill our minds with God's word and with all things that are lovely and pure. Fill our minds with things that make us happy not scared or stressed.
I know there is a lot more peace in my house when I set my mind on peaceful things. Our minds are such amazing things and to know we can have control of our own thoughts has changed my life.
So I encourage to be mindful of what you think on during the day. If it doesn't bring peace or joy to your life cas those thoughts down. Then start thinking on good, healthy things. Your life will slowly change and have more joy in it.
Saturday, January 6, 2018
My Hope Is In You
In April of 2017 sever anxiety and hopelessness hit me like a rock. I felt so lost, scared and I all the sudden didn't know what I wanted out of life anymore. It was like all my passions and hope for my future disappeared.
I started having panic attacks so bad they were bringing physical pain to my body. I couldn't eat, sleep or breathe at times. I had physical pains in my chest and I would go completely numb. After a couple of days I realized I could fight the good fight of faith or let depression and anxiety settle in and make its home inside my body.
I chose to fight! As Christians we are more then conquerors through Christ. Romans 8:37-39 says "Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors and gain an overwhelming victory through Him who loved us [so much that He died for us]. For I am convinced [and continue to be convinced--beyond any doubt] that neither death,or life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able separate us from the [unlimited] love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
I knew if I leaned with all my might on God and dove into His word I could win this fight. It was NOT easy. There were long nights and super early mornings all filled with teachings from preachers on television and LOTS of times studying the word of God. I also got out and walked a whole lot (almost 4 miles a day).
On rough nights when I couldn't sleep I would lay on the couch and have teaching from amazing pastors on the TV. One night there were to separate pastors on back to back. What was crazy was they were both a talking about getting back into or finding a good home church. We had been out of church for about a year. We quite going because the church was too far away for us with two little kids. But I took the hint from the two pastors and I told my husband we were going to try out a church right near us. That next Sunday we went and have been going every since.
Here almost a year later I have been delivered from the hopelessness and anxiety that once tried to take control of my life. It's all because of God and His word.
I know I've shared parts of my story before. But I want to keep writing and posting about it in hopes that it could help someone and let them know with God you can overcome anything.
I started having panic attacks so bad they were bringing physical pain to my body. I couldn't eat, sleep or breathe at times. I had physical pains in my chest and I would go completely numb. After a couple of days I realized I could fight the good fight of faith or let depression and anxiety settle in and make its home inside my body.
I chose to fight! As Christians we are more then conquerors through Christ. Romans 8:37-39 says "Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors and gain an overwhelming victory through Him who loved us [so much that He died for us]. For I am convinced [and continue to be convinced--beyond any doubt] that neither death,or life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able separate us from the [unlimited] love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
I knew if I leaned with all my might on God and dove into His word I could win this fight. It was NOT easy. There were long nights and super early mornings all filled with teachings from preachers on television and LOTS of times studying the word of God. I also got out and walked a whole lot (almost 4 miles a day).
On rough nights when I couldn't sleep I would lay on the couch and have teaching from amazing pastors on the TV. One night there were to separate pastors on back to back. What was crazy was they were both a talking about getting back into or finding a good home church. We had been out of church for about a year. We quite going because the church was too far away for us with two little kids. But I took the hint from the two pastors and I told my husband we were going to try out a church right near us. That next Sunday we went and have been going every since.
Here almost a year later I have been delivered from the hopelessness and anxiety that once tried to take control of my life. It's all because of God and His word.
I know I've shared parts of my story before. But I want to keep writing and posting about it in hopes that it could help someone and let them know with God you can overcome anything.
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