Wow all I can say is that I am so thankful I have the Lord in the good times and bad. He is what get me through my days! Recently getting married I finally am seeing all the things I need to work on as a young women, wife and someday a mother. I honestly had no clue I was letting my emotions, anxieties and fears rule my life as much as they were. I know people have told me through out my life that I did. But honestly I thought I was fine. I mean I was living my life for God. I was doing everything I thought I need to do to be a good christian. But my emotions went from high to low in like two seconds. I blamed it on my past of why I was so unstable or I blamed it on the person that I had a conflict with. I never really truly owned up to my end of things. I never wanted to really work at controlling my emotions or fears.
Well being married now and so far away from my family I only have God and my husband to rely on. Things were getting pretty bad for me. I was letting my emotions take over and it literally in only 5 months of marriage was taring us apart. We love each other SO much and we pray anybody can see that. But without me being stable in the Lord with my emotions, needs, fears and anxieties our marriage is going to struggle. We long for a peaceful marriage because that is who we were. When I am not dealing with my emotional struggles I am so happy and peaceful. So we know that we can have that everyday in our marriage. Not that thing wont get hard or we wont struggle with things. But in those hard times we know we can have peace knowing that the Lord will get us through. Things are getting a lot better now that I am leaning on God, listening, and reading different materials to help me get better. I am so thankful I have such a patient husband. He has such a caring, loving heart and I know that he knows the love of God because I feel God's love through him everyday.
My husband and I are really learning that the life we had as single people we can not really have in the same way anymore. We have consider each other feelings, emotions and surroundings. We have to be in tune with what each other is feeling! We have to be in tune with what we want as a family, and for our marriage! We had a situation just recently happen where one of us were uncomfortable about something and the other was just fine. But in that situation the one who was uncomfortable got hurt because the other person was being selfish and not taking the time to care about how they were feeling. But with this particular situation we learned that we can NOT live like we did when we were single. We have to make choices together as a couple about different things which is going to different from the way we did when we were single! (A friend helped me put in words that way)We have to care about how each other feels and we talked about what were are going to do to help uncomfortable situation not happen as much. Other people may not be okay with what we choose to do, but that doesn't matter. We can't let family and friends tell us what is right and wrong for our marriage and family. That is God's job and God's ALONE. :-) Not that we can't take advice or hear what friends and family have to say, but the over all decision can not be based on what they want.
I am so glad we are learning and working on all this early in our marriage. We are really growing and learning as a couple. Our marriage is molding into a peaceful, beautiful and Godly one. It's never going to be perfect because we are not perfect. But it can be healthy, happy and peaceful. When life gets rough I KNOW Zack will be there to lean on, together and individually we will lean on God to get us through.
I am so happy living out here in Washington. Being married, becoming an adult, choosing how and what is best for me and my family is really great. It's hard at times for sure, but defiantly a great journey to be on. I wouldn't not change my life for a minute. I mean it's hard at times being away from my family, but God gets me through. I know I am where I supposed to be and I know that no matter what I am loved! His family is so excepting of me!
Being married and moving to a whole to state is a learning experience, but it's so great to be learning and growing!!
P.S. Everyone keeps asking so I will just let everyone know NO we are not pregnant yet! But when God gives us little one we will be sure to let everyone know! :-)
Thanks.
Casey
"Until we are treating people the way God treats us, we do not know enough about LOVE." ~ Joyce Myers
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